Evil Chavez Trying To Rig American Elections

I was just reminded by the Minister for New History that the reason that the Ministry disapproves of Hugo Chavez is that he's secretly rigging the voting machines of America to throw the next election to an enemy of our Glorious Leader, George W. Bush.

Yes, that causes consternation here because we've spent the last few years telling the common herd that all voting machines are fair, legal and without fault or problem. The idea that we now have to somehow convince the cattle that voting machines from Sequoia are faulty and rigged while simultaneously pretending that the voting machines owned by our allies at DIEBOLD are not rigged in the favor of the Republican party is causing no end of headaches on the job. Ugh. Luckily, that's why Lord Orwell invented the miraculous invention of doublethink. We'll soon have those chumps believing both things at once, no doubt! Life is doubleplusgood.